SECTION XX
"Bhishma said, 'Thus commanded, the lady said,--Be it so. She then
brought oil (for rubbing the Rishi's body therewith) and a piece of cloth
for his wear during the ablutions. Permitted by the ascetic, she rubbed
every part of his body with the fragrant oil she had brought for him.
Gently was the Rishi rubbed, and when the process of rubbing was over, he
proceeded to the room set apart for the performance of ablutions. There
he sat upon a new and excellent seat of great splendour.[198] After the
Rishi had taken his seat upon it, the old lady began to wash his person
with her own soft hands whose touch was exceedingly agreeable. One after
another in due order, the lady rendered the most agreeable services to
the Rishi in the matter of his ablutions. Between the lukewarm water with
which he was washed, and the soft hands that were employed in washing
him, the Rishi of rigid vows failed to understand that the whole night
had passed away in the process. Rising from the bath the Rishi became
highly surprised. He saw the Sun risen above the horizon on the East. He
was amazed at this and asked himself,--Was it really so or was it an
error of the understanding?--The Rishi then duly worshipped the god of a
thousand rays. This done, he asked the lady as to what he should do. The
old lady prepared some food for the Rishi that was as delicious to the
taste as Amrita itself. In consequence of the delicious character of that
food the Rishi could not take much. In taking that little, however, the
day passed away and evening came. The old lady then asked the Rishi to go
to bed and sleep. An excellent bed was assigned to the Rishi and another
was occupied by herself. The Rishi and the old lady occupied different
beds at first but when it was midnight, the lady left her own bed for
coming to that of the Rishi.'
"Ashtavakra said, 'O blessed lady, my mind turns away from sexual
congress with one who is the spouse of another. Leave my bed, O good
lady. Blessed be thou, do thou desist from this of thy own accord.'[199]
"Bhishma continued, 'Thus dissuaded by that Brahmana with the aid of his
self-restraint, the lady answered him, saying,--I am my own mistress. In
accepting me thou wilt incur no sin.'
"Ashtavakra said, 'Women can never be their own mistresses. This is the
opinion of the Creator himself, viz., that a woman never deserves to be
independent.'
"The lady said, 'O learned Brahmana, I am tortured by desire. Mark my
devotion to thee. Thou incurrest sin by refusing to accost me lovingly.'
"Ashtavakra said, 'Diverse faults, drag away the man that acts as he
likes. As regards myself, I am able to control my inclinations by
self-restraint. O good lady, do thou return to thy own bed.'
"The lady said, 'I bow to thee, bending my head. It behoves thee to show
me thy grace. O sinless one, I prostrate myself before thee, do thou
become my refuge. If indeed, thou seest such sin in congress with one
that is not thy spouse, I yield myself unto thee. Do thou, O regenerate
one, accept my hand in marriage. Thou wilt incur no sin. I tell thee
truly. Know that I am my own mistress. If there by any sin in this, let
it be mine alone. My heart is devoted to thee. I am my own mistress. Do
thou accept me.'
"Ashtavakra said, 'How is it, O good lady, that thou art thy own
mistress. Tell me the reason of this. There is not a single woman in the
three worlds that deserves to be regarded as the mistress of her own
self. The father protects her while she is a maiden. The husband protects
her while she is in youth. Sons protect her when she is aged. Women can
never be independent as long as they live!'
"The lady said, 'I have since my maidenhood, adopted the vow of
Brahmacharyya. Do not doubt it. I am still a maid. Do thou make me thy
wife. O Brahmana, do not kill this devotion of mine to thee.'
"Ashtavakra said, 'As thou art inclined to me, so I am inclined to thee.
There is this question, however, that should be settled. Is it true that
by yielding to my inclinations I shall not be regarded as acting in
opposition to what the Rishi (Vadanya) wishes. This is very wonderful.
Will this lead to what is beneficial? Here is a maiden adorned with
excellent ornaments and robes. She is exceedingly beautiful. Why did
decrepitude cover her beauty so long? At present she looks like a
beautiful maiden. There is no knowing what form she may take
hereafter.[200] I shall never swerve from that restraint which I have
over desire and the other passions or from contentment with what I have
already got. Such swerving does not seem to be good. I shall keep myself
united with truth!'[201]
