SECTION CXVII
"Yudhishthira said, 'Desiring to die or desiring to live, many persons
give up their lives in the great sacrifice (of battle). Tell me, O
grandsire, what is the end that these attain to. To throw away life in
battle is fraught with sorrow for men. O thou of great wisdom, thou
knowest that to give up life is difficult for men whether they are in
prosperity, or adversity, in felicity or calamity. In my opinion, thou
art possessed of omniscience. Do thou tell me the reason of this.'
"Bhishma said, 'In prosperity or adversity, in happiness or woe, living
creatures, O lord of the earth, coming into this world, live according to
a particular tenor. Listen to me as I explain the reason to thee. The
question thou hast asked me is excellent, O Yudhishthira! In this
connection, O king, I shall explain to thee the old narrative of the
discourse that took place in former times between the Island-born Rishi
and a crawling worm. In days of old, when that learned Brahmana, viz.,
the Island-born Krishna, having identified himself with Brahma, roamed
over the world, he beheld, on a road over which cars used to pass, a worm
moving speedily. The Rishi was conversant with the course of every
creature and the language of every animal. Possessed of omniscience, he
addressed the worm he saw in these words.'
"Vyasa said, 'O worm, thou seemest to be exceedingly alarmed, and to be
in great haste. Tell me, whither dost thou run, and whence hast thou been
afraid.'
"The worm said, 'Hearing the rattle of yonder large car I am filled with
fear. O thou of great intelligence, fierce is the roar it makes. It is
almost come! The sound is heard. Will it not kill me? It is for this that
I am flying away. The sound, as it is heard from a near point, I catch,
of the bulls I hear. They are breathing hard under the whip of the
driver, as they are drawing the heavy burden. I hear also the diverse
sounds made by the men who are driving the bulls. Such sounds are
incapable of being heard by a creature that like us has taken his birth
in the order of worms. It is for this reason that I am flying from this
situation of great fright. Death is felt by all creatures to be fraught
with pain. Life is an acquisition difficult to make. Hence, I fly away in
fear, I do not wish to pass from a state of happiness to one of woe.'
"Bhishma continued, 'Thus addressed, the Island-born Vyasa said, 'O worm,
whence can be thy happiness? Thou belongest to the inter-mediate order of
being. I think, death would be fraught with happiness to thee! Sound,
touch, taste, scent, and diverse kinds of excellent enjoyments are
unknown to thee, O worm! I think, death will prove a benefit to thee!'
"The worm said, 'A living creature, in whatever situation he may be
placed, becomes attached to it. In even this order of being I am happy, I
think, O thou of great wisdom! It is for this that I wish to live. In
even this condition, every object of enjoyment exists for me according to
the needs of my body. Human beings and those creatures that spring from
immobile objects have different enjoyments. In my former life I was a
human being. O puissant one, I was a Sudra possessed of great wealth. I
was not devoted to the Brahmanas. I was cruel, vile in conduct, and a
usurer. I was harsh in speech. I regard cunning as wisdom. I hated all
creatures. Taking advantage of pretexts in compacts made between myself
and others. I was always given to taking away what belonged to others.
Without feeding servants and guests arrived at my house, I used to fill,
when hungry, my own stomach, under the impulse of pride, covetous of good
food. Greedy I was of wealth, I never dedicated, with faith and
reverence, any food to the deities and the Pitris although duty required
me to dedicate food unto them. Those men that came to me, moved by fear,
for seeking my protection, I sent adrift without giving them any
protection. I did not extend my protection to those that came to me with
prayers for dispelling their fear. I used to feel unreasonable envy at
seeing other people's wealth, and corn, and spouses held dear by them,
and articles of drink, and good mansions. Beholding the happiness of
others, I was filled with envy and I always wished them poverty,
Following that course of conduct which promised to crown my own wishes
with fruition, I sought to destroy the virtue, wealth, and pleasures of
other people. In that past life of mine, I committed diverse deeds
largely fraught with cruelty and such other passions. Recollecting those
acts I am filled with repentance and grief even as one is filled with
grief at the loss of one's dear son. In consequence of these acts of mine
I do not know what the fruits are of good deeds. I, however, worshipped
my old mother and on one occasion worshipped a Brahmana. Endued with
birth and accomplishments, that Brahmana, in course of his wanderings,
came to my house once as a guest. I received him with reverent
hospitality. In consequence of the merit attaching to that act, my memory
has not forsaken me. I think that in consequence of that act I shall once
more succeed in regaining happiness. O thou of ascetic wealth, thou
knowest everything. Do thou in kindness tell me what is for my good."
